time is cruel. it doesnt wait for ppl. it doesnt allow ppl to slow down. it just dilutes everything. to a point whereby you grow numb to things that once mattered. it just makes everything different. it just makes you withered and torn. it just forces you to snap out. it just pushes you forward so quickly that you cant even catch your breath. it just makes you immune to your surroundings.
1.5yrs wasnt exactly short nor long. it was just sufficient for me to feel that you mattered to me and vice versa but now i know i don't matter anymore. even if we were to be friends again, it wouldn't be the same. i'd rather it be nothing than something different to replace what it was. i told you i give up it was to make me move on. it did help. somewhat i suppose. a little i guess. avoiding won't help in e long run. when it no longer matters, i'll not avoid. of cuz i wish things will go back to the same but i noe it wouldnt. its impossible for you. no matter how many times i tell myself or others i'm fine i know deep down inside i'm still feeling e same as i was 1mth back. if only theres a button that can reset or erase memories. if only i can choose what i want to remember. maybe then i'll be happier.
